From Dr. Jeffrey L. Myers, in his recent book, Cultivate
Parenting coach Cathy Adams says that when she asks parents this kind of question, most say, “I just want my kids to be happy.” Fair enough. Few people would say the opposite.
But what is the biblical answer to the question? If we desire to faithfully apply what we know to be true of God’s nature and character and live out His mission for us as revealed in scripture, then the answer is clear: to love God, to properly steward one’s gifts, to be wise, and to be a blessing to all nations of the earth. Let’s look at #3 …
Be Wise. Proverbs 22:6 says,
“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.”
The Hebrew word for train is “chanak,” the root word of which means “palate” or “jaws.” Some commentators believe the imagery here refers to the Ancient Near Eastern tradition of preparing a date paste to rub on the gums of newborns in order to stimulate their appetite. Furthermore, the word for way is “derek,” which refers to the action of moving, and of a moral course of action. To train up a child in the way he should go, then, means to give a child an appetite for pursuing a productive, godly path in life. This is affirmed throughout the wisdom literature of the Old Testament.
As Proverbs makes clear, what satiates this appetite is wisdom. Wisdom is the most important thing, and it should be acquired even if it costs everything a person has (Proverbs 4:7). In the Old Testament the Hebrew word “hokma” is the most-often used word for wisdom. It means “practical skill in living.” A person is wise who knows how to be a good steward, to create real value, to make difficult decisions, and to avoid temptation.
The extent to which Hebrews valued the long-term discipline of walking in wisdom, even across generations, is seen in Jeremiah 35 when the prophet Jeremiah is told by God to gather together a family called the Rechabites and offer them wine. When Jeremiah does this, the Rechabites refuse, explaining that their father Jonadab had instructed them to never drink wine, and that they had obeyed this command. What’s astounding is that the biblical record indicates that Jonadab lived 240 years before this incident was recorded. Clearly the Rechabites had learned to “walk in the way” and to train their children to do likewise.
